Men’s Mini Course for Understanding Menopause
This Men’s Course for Understanding Menopause is meant to assist any man that is in a relationship with a woman and wants to be able to assist her through the different stages of menopause which can be a trying time for her. Not only can it be difficult for the woman, but it can take its toll on the relationship, but it doesn’t have to be that way.
Throughout any relationship between a man and a woman, they experience many journeys together. Some of these are positive and others which are negative. They have their ups and downs along with their agreements and disagreements.
Over the years of a relationship, each person goes through different transitions that can affect the relationship and really put it through many tests. Menopause for the woman is a transition in her life where changes are taking place in her body and she needs support while dealing with this.
What You Are Going to Learn In this Mini Course for Understanding Menopause
This mini-course is meant to arm you with the knowledge about menopause so that you and your partner can enter this stage of her life together. You should be able to go through its transitions without it having a negative impact on your relationship. You will learn about…..
- Why you as a man need to have this knowledge so you know what is happening.
- You will be given an overview as to what menopause is and what is physically taking place in your partner’s body.
- There is a section that fully explains what your partner is feeling both physically and mentally while these changes are taking place.
- When finished with this mini course you will have a greater insight as to how your partner is reacting to the changes she is experiencing.
- Your partner’s time of menopause is going to affect you and the information here will help you to recognize how this is affecting you.
- You will need to develop some coping skills and there is a section here to help you with that.
- Learning to deal with the effects of menopause separately is important, but just as important is learning how to work through it together, and this outline will help you learn how to do this.
These are the objectives of this course with the main goal being to create an understanding in you that menopause is a natural part of life and it is not something that you have to fear in regards to it being detrimental to your relationship.
In fact, with the new knowledge that you will have gained from here, you should be able to go through menopause with your spouse in a much more positive manner than you would have before learning about this.
PART ONE
Why Men Need to Understand Menopause
Most men do realize that their spouse will at some point in time have to deal with menopause. A lot of guys don’t have much more understanding beyond that. Some are aware that it does cause changes in mood.
It is not uncommon to hear a male joke when their partner is in a bad mood that it’s just because they are going through menopause. This comment is made in general and most of the men making it don’t have any idea as to whether this is actually true. This type of joke has become a common one because one of the main symptoms of menopause for the woman can be mood swings.
It is really important to understand what menopause is in order for the man to be able to fully support his wife. When becoming knowledgeable in this segment of a woman’s life it will allow the man to recognize the signs and symptoms of it. A lot of women don’t recognize when they are first starting into menopause, but they do know they are experiencing some changes and they often will not talk about this.
The importance of men having an understanding of what menopause is has been recognized in the health industry to the point where there are being some studies done as to the importance of men understanding menopause.
What is Menopause?
Menopause is not a disease or a condition. It is a transition that a woman’s body goes through which brings the end to her reproductive years.
Two important components of a woman’s reproductive system are comprised of her uterus and two ovaries. The eggs needed for reproductive are stored in the ovaries.
Productive Years
Prior to menopause, approx. every month or so a woman’s body goes through what is called a follicular phase. This is where her body is preparing for a pregnancy. The uterus lining begins to thicken for this event. The ovary prepares to release an egg and if that egg becomes fertilized with a male sperm it can attach to the uterus lining and a pregnancy has begun.
If no fertilization with a male sperm occurs then there is no implantation of the egg and the thickened lining now turns to blood which is ejected from the body which is the menstrual period. This cycle then begins all over again.
Menopause Years
Beginning around the late 30’s for the average woman the egg production begins to slow down and some hormone changes begin to take place. Subtle menopause symptoms may begin and the menstrual cycles may not be as long.
Between the late 30’s to early 50’s
The menstrual cycles become sporadic to where they eventually stop all together. This process can take anywhere from two to eight years.
PART TWO
What Do Women Experience When Going Through Menopause?
The woman’s reproductive system is governed by hormones. The two main hormones are estrogen and progesterone. During the course of menopause, these hormones rise and fall. When this is happening it is creating many of the menopause symptoms that some women have to deal with. Not every woman will experience every symptom, and the ones they do have will vary in intensity.
Menopause symptoms include…
- Hot flashes
- Vaginal dryness and/or thinning or inflammation
- Discomfort during intercourse
- Lack of interest in sex
- Increased need to urinate or not being able to hold urine
- Urinary tract infections
- Sleep disturbances
- Changes in skin and hair
- Mood swings
- Depression
How Do They React?
With such a long list of potential symptoms to have to deal with it is understandable why the menopause years can be rough for some women. It is also easy to see how any of these symptoms could have an impact on a relationship.
Just as every woman experiences a variety of these symptoms in varying intensities they also each react to them in their own way.
There are some women who are able to recognize these symptoms quickly and know they are part of menopause. For those that don’t, they often become frightened about them. When they are experiencing the physical symptoms they may be fearful that something is physically wrong with them. Then they become agitated and frustrated because some of the symptoms are hindering their lifestyle. They may not be open to discussing these experiences with you as their partner, because they don’t understand them either.
For some women, they don’t have any significant experience with the physical symptoms but are being subjected to those that are having a mental effect. For example, they find they can’t sleep well at night. Or, they just aren’t interested in a sexual relationship with you anymore. Then they may find themselves becoming sad or irritated and they cannot find justification for this.
When these types of mental symptoms begin to occur many women begin to question themselves as to why it is happening? They may start to wonder if they are not happy in their relationship with you anymore but they don’t know why this would be the case. This is emotionally exhausting for your partner. For you no doubt you are beginning to recognize some emotional changes in your partner and it is just as unsettling for you.
PART THREE
What is the Negative Impact on Men?
Whether you realize it or not you are going to feel some of the impact from the menopause that your partner is going through. Again to what degree will depend on what your spouse is experiencing.
Impaired Sexual Relationship
You may find that your spouse is not as interested in sex. This can be as a result of several of the physical menopausal symptoms that she is experiencing. If she is dealing with vaginal discomfort or urinary tract infections it is understandable why she would not want to have sex with you.
Then from the emotional standpoint, she may be dealing with a decline in libido as a result of the fluctuation in her hormones. In addition to this, if she is dealing with mood swings and depression then she is not in a good mental state for a sexual relationship.
All of these symptoms are going to have an impact on you. From your standpoint, your partner is still the same as she has always been. You still have that same desire to be sexually active with her, yet she is rejecting you. This has a big emotional impact on you.
Decreased Socialization
You may find that your partner is no longer interested in going out to social events with you. This can be very difficult on your relationship particularly if in the past you have been used to socializing and enjoying the company of others with your partner.
If she is experiencing hot flashes these are very distressing and embarrassing for her. She may not want to have to deal with this in a public setting. Also, she may be dealing with changes in her skin and hair so she doesn’t feel as attractive anymore, and doesn’t want to be seen in public as much. Then again there is also the mood swings which includes sadness and she just doesn’t feel like being in a crowd of happy people.
For you, this is very difficult. You may end up having to make excuses as to why you are not attending social functions. Or, it may end up where you have to attend them alone. This puts you in an uncomfortable situation where you now feel that you have to make excuses for your partner. Again, another strain on your relationship.
How Can You Cope?
All too often the challenges that menopause brings to the men in a loving relationship go unnoticed. Many times men are accused of being insensitive to their partner’s needs during this time. It is not uncommon for relationships to come to an end during the menopause years, simply because the negative aspect of this transition in the woman’s life has placed a heavy burden on the partnership.
You will be able to cope much better now that you have a better understanding of what is happening to your partner.
Without this knowledge, you may have taken the side effects of the menopause personally. Meaning, that when your partner didn’t want to have sex with you that you were thinking it was because of you. You may be trying to think of something you may have done or the fear that she no longer found you sexually appealing. This creates feelings of rejection. Now that you know it is not you as the cause, you can be more understanding and compassionate about the situation.
Frustration is another emotion that you may have to deal with. Not understanding why your partner no longer wants to socialize may lead you to think that you are no longer compatible with each other. Yet up until now, you had no idea as to why. Knowing that there are valid reasons as to why your partner does not want to socialize will help to reduce the frustration and you won’t have to deal with this as much.
PART FOUR
How Can You and Your Spouse Work Through Menopause Together?
One of the most successful ways of being able to get through menopause as a couple is to work through it jointly. Two to eight years of having to deal with this may seem like a long time. However, with you both focusing on a proper it can be a life’s transition that has a minimal negative impact, and in fact, can even strengthen your relationship.
Communication
Communication about the situation is going to be your best tool for working through menopause. You as the male may have to be the one that takes the lead in the beginning. Remember, your spouse is going through some emotional challenges. You need to encourage her to talk about what she is feeling both physically and mentally. Although you have no control over her physical symptoms just having someone that she can talk to about them is going to give her real support.
Patience
Patience is going to be something else that you need to practice. Your spouse will be dealing with mood swings and some of which will cause her to become agitated or irritated easily. During these episodes, you may have to just bite your tongue if she is being unreasonable. During these times look for ways that you can diffuse the situation. It may mean just suggesting you go for a walk or do something that you enjoy together.
Recognition
It is going to take extra effort on your part to make sure that you verbally express recognition and appreciation for your spouse. During this time she may be dealing with a lot of mixed emotions. Just the fact that she can no longer have children could be having a negative impact on her.
Recognize the fact that she is noticing changes in her appearance. Here is where some extra compliments will really go a long way in boosting her morale and make her feel good about herself.
Education
It could very well be that you are now more educated concerning menopause than what your spouse is. If you suspect this to be the case then encourage her to seek out her own studies about menopause. If she has a better understanding of what is happening with her body she will be able to deal with it much easier.
Change of Lifestyle
It may be that you will need to change your lifestyle in some small ways to help accommodate this transition. If socializing is an issue because of the menopause symptoms, then alternatives may need to be considered. Instead of going out in public with friends and family you may have to arrange for more outings that include just the two of you. This way she still gets a break from her normal routine without the pressure of having to deal and explain some of her physical menopause symptoms to others.
Understand Each Other’s Needs
Make sure you plan for both of you to have your own space. Take some time where you can be away from each other to give yourselves a break, and the opportunity to deal with any of the stress that may be present.
Hopefully, this small mini-course will help you go through the menopause transition with your partner in a much more productive and rewarding way.